“Mrrrap.”
The black cat circled around my legs, looking up at me with big, bright red eyes. “Mrrrap.”
Pretty sure those eyes actually glow in the dark. rather than just light reflecting off a membrane. Sometimes I’ve woken up in the middle of the night to see two red dots staring at me from the doorway, a corner of the room, my dresser, or even on my chest. Even if the room’s pitch-black I can see them, bright as ever.
Last night it was curled up next to me, purring.
I’ve tried everything to get rid of it. Ignoring it, shooing it away, actually resorting to things like salt, ash and sage. All ignoring it did was make it act up for attention, knocking things over, nibbling on my fingers or sitting on my keyboard. Shooing it off? The cat looked at me, looked at the open door, and then sat down to groom itself.
The salt, sage and ash just made it angry. Rather than disappearing or running out the door like I’d hoped it would it hissed and swiped at me, leaving bloody claw marks down my arm before fleeing upstairs.
The cat was in a foul mood for the rest of the night, growling and grumbling as it paced around the house. I woke up once to see those angry red eyes glaring at me in the dark, even though I’d closed my bedroom door.
Figures that a spirit —or whatever the cat really is— wouldn’t be stopped by a closed door.
That week was awful. Nearly broke my neck tripping on the stairs, was late every day, lost my wallet, locked myself out of the house and just missed getting hit by a car as I was crossing the street by a hair’s breadth. It only stopped when I offered the cat toys and treats by way of apology. After that it was all purrs and slow blinks, sweet as could be.
I’d never have played that stupid game if I’d known, but how could I have known? All it was supposed to be was just a party game, something spooky to do at a sleepover. Kind of like ‘Light as a Feather, Stiff as a Board’, only rather than having the rest of your friends levitate you, you’re scratched by an imaginary cat.
Weird, I know. Who wants to be scratched by a cat? But that was what Julie wanted to play, so that’s what we did. We dimmed the lights and closed all the drapes while I lay on the floor and, at Julie’s direction, pictured myself walking until I made my way down a dark alley. In that alley I found a large black cat with red eyes, which leapt and clawed me.
I actually felt a stinging pain, and heard everyone gasp as three long, red scratches appeared down my arm, looking like a cat had actually gotten me. Stung like hell too, but that’s no different from a normal cat scratch. I rinsed it off with cold water and didn’t think anything of it.
Until the cat showed up.
After its little tantrum I called Julie, telling her what had happened. Once I sent her a few pictures, all of which came up oddly blurry no matter what, to prove to her that I wasn’t joking and that the cat was real, she replied in a profoundly unhelpful way.
“I’d just go with it. You have a cat now.”
“Yeah, but what am I supposed to do? I don’t want a cat!”
“Well, it wants you. Just don’t make it mad, I guess?”
I could hear the shrug in her voice. Like ‘Yeah, so you’ve got some kind of demon cat attached to you. Good luck with that.’
Sometimes I think I need better friends.
Anyway, now I have a cat. A strange, magical, possibly an evil spirit cat, but a cat all the same. It plays with toys. It loves catnip and chatters at birds. It’ll run around the house at odd hours and sing the song of its people. To be honest I’m really grateful it eats cat food and doesn’t need human blood or something.
Turkey is its favorite. It licks the bowl clean when I give it turkey, though chicken and tuna are good too. Sometimes I give it slices of turkey breast as a treat, and I’m guaranteed to have a good day when I do.
As long as I’m good to kitty, kitty is good to me.
And if anyone should happen to mistreat me? Well, kitty will make sure they have a very, very bad day indeed.
Loosely inspired by the Cat Scratch game, which you can read about here: https://theghostinmymachine.com/2020/08/19/the-most-dangerous-games-cat-scratch-meditation-hypnosis-sleepover/
Awww, someun's got a Spiorad Beathach. Keep plenty of turkey around.
Ooooo.
I love the image of Kitty too.
Stay away, but come over written in the eyes.